Why Are You Still Looking for Headlines?

If we outsource all of the intelligence, who would notice?

Life is a peach but not a pear. Nobody can fight against a full-grown pear. I only know one fictive character doing that. He survived. The pear did not.

If I'm measuring my intelligence, how long will it take for me to know what I'm measuring?

No-one can be told about the new Playboy 4. But two people who has experienced it can talk about it. Will they be talking about the page numbers or the games they play?

Always when I'm looking at the old female pictures, I think they are a bit of conservative. We should protect the new picture!

I like people who know how to answer the right questions, don't you?

It's nice to know that performance art is not dead. I just read about it, and it seems to be thriving. 

You know people who hate politicians who say a lot and still so little. I wish they wouldn't talk so much.

When asked how I always make things look so easy, I say it's magic. Magicians never show their tricks. They make it look so hard. 

I miss those old book clubs where you would be send books every month with a price of a yearly subscription and you would just archive them into your bookcase. Internet destroyed it.

Would you accept Groucho Marx into your club? I would just post his application to Internet, and let him deal with the after shower. I would use my own name.

Do you remember when you were kids and toys were smaller than you. Then you grew up and so did the toys. And the budgets. And the bills. And the inflation. And your kids.

I still laugh about the time during that sad Christmas when I was hoping for a cancer that would kill me fast and painlessly, and I got a Playstation 4. I still haven't finished any of the games that I have bought. 

Of course every European knows that Santa Claus is from Finland, and American that he is from North Pole, and 9 percent of Christians that Jesus is from Bethlehem. I made the statistics up just to stop people mocking religions.